Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Pol Pot & Khmer Rouge 1- Media/Ugly Betty 0

Has Russell Brand been reading this blog? (Despite the obvious connection that Russell Brand and Miss Goody have the same agent, which somewhat confuses the issue, and the fact he uses the term 'silly' rather than 'fucking stupid' which as i think you'll agree is more apt given that she was well aware that there was some 5-8million viewers watching her...but anyway.)

Have the Indian Government/Channel 4 been reading this blog?

Word to the wise to Jade's Agent, would be not to visit India. Seriously, with the best intentions in the world she will at somepoint say something that will re-open the ‘racist debate/debacle’. I’ll give odds of 2:1 that she makes some remark about ‘it smelling like curry’ or something else equally as crass (or should I say 'silly'?)

Mp3Bonnie ‘Prince’ Billy- Ain’t You Wealthy, Ain’t You Wise

In other exciting news: I forgot my glasses today and have noticed a stark contrast in the way I've been treated by colleagues and fellow commuters. Could it be that despite the years of progress, the wearing of glasses is still considered as something funny? C'mon surely those cliches don't exist anymore do they?

Consider this: As moderately enjoyable as 'Ugly Betty' is ,as far a high camp and sillyness before the last five minutes of American schmaltz that seems to be mandatory in any US comedy- she isn't really that ugly though is she? As quoted in the Simpsons : "I wanted TV ugly, not Ugly Ugly!"

America Ferrera (yes her real name is America!) who plays Ugly Betty seems to be some form of spokeswoman for the 'uglies' in US TV, and had already starred in the HBO show 'Real Women have Curves' where she tries "to balance her mother's traditional view of women with her own contemporary ideas while dealing with self-image issues and exploring a new romantic relationship" (The sound of puking and yawning at the same time). Also, international 'hottie' Salma Hayek (gratuitously pictured below) is the executive produer of the show- discrediting it somewhat. I'm sure she can relate and empathisie to the Betty's plight though can't you.

It's a bit like ole ''Plain Jane Superbrain' in Neighbours...put some glasses on her and some frumpy clothes and she's 'ugly' too (allegedly). Why is it most 'TV ugly' folks wear glasses? They're installing the thought to the Populus that if you're a 'specky' then you're ugly. Let's not forget how fickle Lousie Lane wouldn't look twice at Clark Kent, but got a wide-on every time Superman flew into the vicinity. "Down with their cynicism and cliches" I say. (Lazer Eye Sugery is the work of Satan etc etc)

(note/trivia: Jim Robinson is in Ugly Betty!!)

At least the former policies of crackpot dictator Pol Pot suggested that all glasses wearers were intellectuals, which is not funny especially considering his regime had anyone wearing glasses executed, (well it kind of is funny I suppose - his hired goons waiting with big sticks with nails through them outside Specs Savers) but he never denounced them as Ugly (Pol Pot & Khmer Rouge 1- Media/Ugly Betty 0)

I actually went to have my eyes tested this week, and Lord be Praised! my right eye has improved marginally! Woot! I don't know how this is possible, perhaps I've used that eye less? Perhaps I've got moderatly prettier?

Whilst at the Opticians I was toying with the idea of purchasing a new pair of glasses, I noticed that the models in Glasses Advertisements don't look like 'proper' glasses wearers? i.e. people who wear glasses. This is difficult for me to explain succinctly, but they almost look like generic photos of models that someone has drawn a pair of 'bins' on them. I'm guessing that these models are too vain to wear glasses (I repeat 'Down with their cynicism and cliches!') and perhaps it's the image of beautiful man/woman with a pair of Hugo Boss angular glasses on his/her face that just looks out of place. I'm not sure how this could be resolved. By me suggesting that 'ugly' people should model the new range of designer glasses is essentially admitting that glasses wearers are, for the most part; ugly. It's a mystery, shrouded in an enigma, shrouded in a mystery for sure. My solution would be to re-cast the role of Ugly Betty with Kathy Burke playing the role- similar to that of her character
Linda La Hughes in the brilliant 'Gimme Gimme Gimme'. That'll learn em! (plus it will make the program infinately more viewable without having the sick bucket on hand)

Of course the way in which my colleagues are treating me could be down to the fact that I can't see them very clearly or that I in fact look worse without my glasses. On thing's for sure, there has been no presumptions that I am an expert on all IT matters and hence a little more time at work to concentrate on writing these 'ere blog rather than showing the same colleagues how to find their Word documents on their computer, how to change the toner and more annoyingly how to send an e-mail! (these are GENUINE requests I get on a daily basis, much to my discontent!)

MP3 The Annuals - Bleary Eyed

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