Sunday, April 01, 2007

Driven to cheese

I’ve been far too focused on other silly little time consuming waste of timers to update this blog- which is a shame when I consider some of the little events that have amused, annoyed and befuddled me in the past week. Notably, watching paint dry (literally) at a friends house warming, Lisa’s birthday and the small matter that I was driven to cheese last week.

Two days into our new office and being sat within earshot of a certain colleague had me storming over to the local sandwich shop and slapping a £2 coin of the counter and demanding the a cheese sandwich post haste!

It did little to ease my woes and the remorse and guilt felt afterwards was a thoroughly unpleasant cocktail of misery and despair. I also made a fundamental error in admitting my lapse to Lisa, who of course the berated me to start drinking again- or more importantly to her, to drink on her birthday which was last Saturday. I didn’t relent. My resolve remained. The cheese was a stress induced blip.

Aside from that the and suffering at the hands of man flu, this morning’s unpleasantness puts it all into perspective.

Firstly, I can kind of accept that despite all the berating by my nearest and dearest to ensure my Glastonbury registration’s photographs were adequate (I had to retake the required passport photos due to my unfeasibly large noggin not fitting within the picture’s frame) , and that I had sent the completed registration forms within the allotted time. I also had to endure an unpleasant 30mins looking for my registration form which I had simply and innocently misplaced, whilst an irate girlfriend lambasted me for my general slackness. However, despite getting up at 8.30 am (which is unbelievable for us on a Sunday) stricken with the aforementioned man flu we proceeded to attempt to acquire some Glasto tickets.

Off course despite using two phone’s and about a millions attempts to access their website we were unjustly unsuccessful AGAIN.

To compound matters my least favourite cheeky television/radio ‘star’ Vernon Cunting Kay was on our radio with a whole host of chav knob heads ringing up to boast about their ticket joy. Some even bragging that they managed to get their greedy little mitts on 12 tickets! Of course these fuckers when being asked what bands they’d like to see respond with fuckwit answers like “oh I don’t know, I love razorlight…”


On one hand if the Festival is going to be full of shit for brains like these then I suppose it’s not such a bad thing, but as I’ve never been yet, I’m starting to get slightly fucked off. I’ve been lucky enough to attend Leeds/Reading 7 or 8 times, V Fest, Euro Sonic, Benacassim and SXSW yet this fest eludes me. Leeds and Benacassism are ‘off’ for us this year as my sister and my father are both to be married on these weekends.

We (the band) were asked to play Glastonbury one year but our very much ex –manager, in his wisdom turned it down as he thought we should have been on a bigger stage. We only learned this several months afterwards and we were strangely never asked again.

Oh well.

Anyway, I’ve got to get back to consoling my distressed girlfriend.

Vernon Kay I hope you’re happy you cunt.

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